Forgive & Release: A-Z Blog Challenge: B is for BATTLE of the Sexes

A sure path to happiness is to forgive and release hurtful feelings. It is not necessary to forgive and FORGET, but in most cases it is necessary to forgive and release the pain so you can regain your power and live with more smiles in your life.

Battle of the Sexes“A stiff apology is a second insult…the injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged;
he wants to be healed because he has been hurt.”
Gilbert K. Chesterton

To apologize has different meanings to the sexes:

For women we apologize so we can reconnect with someone whose feelings we have hurt. It is usually quick for us to apologize. This is a routine aspect of the female relationship. There is no sense of loss if we apologize quickly and honestly.

For men apologies can be humiliating resulting in a sense of loss. They perceive a connection between what they say and how others perceive them. Often men feel acknowledging they have done something wrong means they are diminished in the eyes of those who hear the apology.

When I found this in my research on apologies it was a real eye opener for me. I admit there are men I have placed in this ”no sense in trusting them again” category because they have done something to me that caused me career or relationship harm. What could have changed this connection? One simple acknowledgement of their error and a brief apology would have changed everything; instead they have been moved into a boundaried area of my life so as to neutralize any additional actions.

It is said that women carry around more unresolved anger in their relationships with men due to this difference in what an apology means to the sexes than any other source of anger in a relationship. Does this mean it would be possible to reduce the divorce rate if we simply apologized and reconnected?

I would love your feedback, do you agree with the above difference between the sexes? How has this impacted your relationship with members of the opposite sex? Please add your comments.

Today’s SIMPLE SMILE IGNITER is to reconnect with some who may need a simple acknowledgment of what went wrong and brief apology. Remember, “the injured party does not want to be compensated, they want to be healed.” Today heal.

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